O.M.G........!!!!!

What a last few months we have had, i don't even know where i should start.
first things first i got my new lungs, and there very nice new lungs as it goes too, i got the call at 5.30am on Monday the 23rd may 2011 and went up with my mum in the ambulance and Matt and my dad followed up in my dads car, Matt's mum and dad came over to look after Connor.
when we gott there i had bloods taken and was taken to the ward i would be going on when i came out of ITC after the op, after the new lungs were all given a good once over and given the all clear i was taken down to start me new life at around 12.15ish. i shade a few tears as i said my see you soons to Matt, mum and dad and then woke up to hear people taking and felt tubes being taken out of my mouth and nose and then after a bit i could open my eyes and see my mum and Matt and i think my dad was there too...i found out it was around 10.30am on the Tuesday so had been out for nearly a whole day but it only seemed like i had close my eyes for a few mins.
i had four chest drains in, two at the front and one either of my sides and a big dressing down my chest from my collar bone area to just above my feeding button. i don't think i was really in any pain that i can think of at that time but i was being sick once i started to eat or drink anything so on the second day (Wednesday) they stopped my morphine and just had me on iv paracetamol and tramadol, also on the Wednesday they took out the two front drains and then the next two the day after that.
i was doing well but as it sounded like i had some gunk stuck i was given a bronch on the Friday and felt much better and not gunky after that and then was taking to the post op ward on the Saturday were i stayed for nearly two weeks and then was sent home! i was in hospital altogether for 17 days, i was told i would be in hospital for around a month so i was very happy that i was doing so well that i could be sent home after such a short stay. i must have been doing very well indeed.

since then I'm getting stronger and stronger and have been back in hospital for another bronch at 3 weeks and now I'm back in as my LF has dropped but apart from that everything else is great so there not to sure whats going on but to be on the safe side they have got me in again to have 3 days of iv 500mg steroids and a bronch at the end to rule out any rejection.

apart from this little blip I'm doing so well and I'm so proud of myself and cant wait till I'm fully healed and can start living my life and getting a job and running and playing with Connor, there is so much and I'm just so happy i was given this chance of a 2nd life with Connor and Matt.

that's the gist of it but i will update more as and when it comes back to me as the first week was a bit of a bluer to me as i was very sleepy and not really with it much.

The long a-waited answer

Is anyone even reading this blog? prob not haha

Anyway lets get to the point shall we......I'M ON THE LIST!
Well as from the 1st of April ish as i have to have a smear test done next week but I'm very happy about it all and cant wait to start my new life, our new life mine, Matt and Connor.
All the tests they did was pretty much normal and i have had most of them done before so it wasn't anything from the norm for me.
I had my button changed today too and it bleed a little so that freaked me out a tad but its fine now, it was also changed for a smaller one as it keeps leaking so i will see if this one is any better.
I'm going home soon, 15 hours and 20 Min's lol i cant wait, 9am to moz and I'm out that door and they wont see me for dust! i hope i can stay away for a good 6 weeks this time, might even get a call before coming back in haha that's scary to think, scary but good.
The food is so bad in here i don't think i would even feed it to my dog! mums cooking for me when i get home, yum cant wait and just thinking about home cooking is making my mouth water as i type!

I have been thinking of doing some sort of course for when i get my lungs and start my new life, i have always wanted to work with animals but since having all the TX talks i don't think i should risk it (no that your cant work with them, just birds i think)  so i was stuck as to what i could do and then a friend from papworth who is staying in at the moment too who has done a nail training course from ICS so i have had a look and i think i will give that a go.

There is alot more i need to say but i cant think of everything at the moment, theses last few days have taken a toll on me mentally i think more then anything else.

Breathing

Why has it gotten so hard to breathe over the last few days?
I don't know how people do this day in day out, its a very scary thing, something that i have taken for granted before.
i mean don't get me wrong, i have had bad days before when i cant breathe well at all and get very out of breath and tired but nothing like this.
I'm now worrying that this is what its going to be like from now on, walking in to another room kills me, walking up the stairs kills me, bending down kills me.
i haven't ever been scared about my breathing before, i am now.
i have even asked Matt not to do his one day a week at work to moz coz I'm scared i wont be able to even get myself a cup of tea let alone make lunch for myself.
this is a pretty down post today.

Matt is worried, i can see it in his face even if he wont admit it.
every time i cough or catch my breath there is a look in his eyes that tells all.
Connor on the other hand pats my back and asks if i need a glass of water :) love him. he is far to young to understand what is going on and i just hope i get my new lungs this year so he is still young and wont remember it much.

going to ring papworth to moz and get myself a bed to start some iv's. i want septrin to give me a good shot.
I'll prob still be in for when i have my TX tests next Monday too.

Blog From Room 2

All my blog seemed to be is about me being ill these last few months lol

I came back in hospital on Friday for some i.v's and was meant to be going on on the Saturday, that's didn't go to plan when i had another turn on the i.v's, this time it was from Mero i.v. as gemma's words....evil i.v
so i got a temp over 40 and was so cold i couldn't stop shacking, they stripped me down and pulled my cover off and even put the air con on to cool me down! i wasn't happy at all as i was so cold to start with but they said if i didn't cool down then i could have a fit.

So i should be starting to have more i.v's on Monday and then they want to keep me till Wednesday to make sure everything is ok then i can go home and do the rest of the i.v's at home.

My friend Victoria had her 8th false call for a TX last night so that was really upsetting for me coz i just want her to get that new life so much, she is so strong and never shows that it has upset her or anything. it will be this year...it has to be.

9 weeks and 5 days till I'm a MRS! not long, there is so much i still need to do that we haven't sorted yet coz I'm not feeling gr8 but once I'm out of here i will get alot more done.

Connor came to see me today in hospital and we went out for lunch (with Matt, mum and dad too) i wont get to see him now till I'm home as he has pre-school on Mondays and Wednesday. i don't mind to much coz i know he don't like it here and gets bored easy so its not fair to keep him up here just for me.

When we came up here there was a note saying that we cant have flowers on the ward anymore :( Matt laughed and said it got him out of buying me them now! not that he did much before!

The new rooms are really nice, i'll have to get some photos before i leave. the toilet light just comes on when you open the door i love it! its all big and open, its gr8.

Going to go now but will blog again with what the next lot of i.v's are.